Why I believe a Mac will fulfill my life.

I desperately want a Mac laptop. I was converted earlier in the Fall but have yet to save up the resources necessary to purchase a beautiful Mac. (Crib, car seat, stroller, and diapers are consuming my savings)

Here are the reasons why I believe a Mac will fulfill my life:

• Its Powerpoint animation is to die for (my favourite is the "cube"). Sidenote: did you know that Apple created powerpoint and sold it to Microsoft?
  
• Every serious designer owns a Mac.
  
• Macs are built to last (unlike my stupid HP Tablet).
  
• Mac will not freeze on me (unlike my stupid HP Tablet).
  
• Mac offers original and outstanding templates.
  
• Just the look of a Mac causes inspiration.
  

There's always this argument with artists and creative people. Do the tools you use really help create inspiration?

I believe that the answer is: YES..... to a certain extent.

I'm a marketer.

It is my job to convince you to realize that the tools you use (ie. the products I'm selling) will change your life and THAT is why you should spend the money to buy it. Of course, this marketing proposition isn't always true. Some of the stuff really is useless.

I compare the tools you use to create your art to your settings. The environment that surrounds writers, painters, web designers, etc. is very important. Some writers need a peaceful getway, away from reality, to create their masterpieces. Some artists thrive on busy streets where commotion is their inspiration.

I need to have music on when I write. I tried to multi-task and listen to my talk-radio stations as I wrote. Couldn't concentrate. I write best when I'm in my bed, late at night. Or, I have to be sitting in my big armchair by my HUGE window with no one around me.

Just as the atmosphere is important, so are the tools used. On my desk, you'll find 10 different neon highlighters, multi-colored pens (both ball-point and gel), 4 different sized and colored post-it pads and a collection of STAEDTLER watercolor pencils heaping inside my metal desk organizer. Behind my massive inventory of writing utensils, you can see an equally massive stack of different notebooks, artbooks and folders.

Maybe it's just my obsession with organizing that I have all these different tools, but I really find that using certain objects help inspire creative thoughts.

And, of course, flipchart paper. Flipchart paper is THE BEST PURCHASE YOU'LL EVER MAKE. Nothing like a big piece of paper just waiting to be filled to spure you on.

Blog Design Usability

Jakob Nielsen is the guru of web design usability. His tips are the foundation to building a fantastic website.

The article I found particularly interesting was Weblog Usuability: The Top Ten Design Mistakes.

The reason I'm posting a blog about this is because:

1. I'm still working on the web design of my new blog and I found these tips immensely helpful
   
2. I'm tired of reading other people's blog that are horribly designed.
   

Here are the 6 tips I found most useful:

1. Links Don't Say Where They Go
   

   I hate going to blogs and seeing every other word underlined and linking to somewhere. I never click on the link unless I know what to expect. People are already time-poor. No one has time to click on these unknown links.
   

   Using link titles is one way to create good links. (Link titles should be less than 80 characters, and should only rarely go above 60 characters. Shorter link titles are better). Or, you can just clearly state what the link is linking to.
   

2. Classic Hits are Buried
   

   Don't assume that everyone who comes to you blog has been there from the beginning. Link to past entries in order to help the reader understand where you are coming from.
   

   An easy way to do this is to clearly state at the top of your entry
   

   "Read this first: (link 1) and (link 2)".
   

3. The Calendar is the Only Navigation
   

   By nature, blog are listed in a descending timeline. Correctly categorizing your blog posts helps readers find related topics, thereby increasing the likliehood that they will return to your blog.
   

   Good categories are sufficiently detailed but not too long. Having 10-20 categories is good. Too many are just overwhelming and readers will glaze past them.
   

4. Irregular Publishing Frequency
   

   What's that saying? Less is more.
   

   This definitely hold true to blogs (and tweets for that matter). You want readers to come running to your website and devour your latest update. If readers don't know when to expect your blog post, the less likely they will return to your site. If you're serious about blogging, set up a publication schedule. That's what I do. I write my articles the night before and then upload them at an opportune time the next day.
   

   The same with tweeting. You want people to take the time and read what you wrote. If you saturate your readers with meaningless post after post, people will start ignoring you. Their eyes will automatically skip over your writing. You don't want that!
   

   LESS IS MORE!
   

5. Forgetting That You Write for Your Future Boss
   

   Here's one of my constant dilemmas. Is what I'm writing going to bite me in the ass? There are TONS of topics about my personal life that I'd love to write about. But I hold back because the contents might be seen as inappropriately personal to a potential boss. Until I'm successful and so valuable that bosses don't care WHAT I SAY, then I'll write without any boundaries.
   

6. Having a Domain Name Owned by a Weblog Service
   

   This is why I'm going through all this effort to create my own website.
   

   Neilsen says, quote, "Having a weblog address ending in blogspot.com, typepad.com, etc. will soon be the equivalent of having an @aol.com email address or a Geocities website: the mark of a naïve beginner who shouldn't be taken too seriously".
   

Finding Passion

Oh my. It's already 2 o'clock and I haven't started any school work.

I've re-filled my water bottle, smeared wonderful smelling shea butter on my hands, put on some soft music and am ready to pour out my soul into today's blog post.

I'm having a baby. Just wanted to state that and move on. I'm going to do it. I'm going to be a mother and everything else that I want to be in the world.

I'm in no rush to reach all my dreams, I mean, half the fun is in the adventure to get their right?

As I'm writing today's blog, I'm also doodling in my art book.... in WATER COLORS! I haven't painted in years.

And as soon as I wrote that, I ran through my room and my sister's room trying to locate my water color pencils. Found them! ... in the bottom drawer at the back of my sister's closet.

Yesterday, I talked about happiness. I thought about happiness. I cannot conclude anything about happiness.

In my mind... it's a no brainer what happiness is, but when I try and write it out, try to apply it.... blankness. I think the reason the idea of happiness has suddenly taken over my life this past week is because I went from knowing what made me happy to NOT knowing. I was, out of nowhere, faced with all these options that forced me to think of other ways I could make myself happy. And not just short-term happiness; I had to unexpectedly re-evaluate everything I knew about my long-term happiness. What makes me happy? Are the things that make me happy right or wrong?

Thinking about happiness is getting me nowhere.

Passion however. Passion is something I can hold in my hands.

I am passionate about living life as fully as I can. I am passionate about creating and keeping meaningful friendships. I am passionate about creating things with my hands and my mind. I am passionate about learning and using that knowledge to change the world. I am passionate about clothes and creating beauty. I am passionate about writing and observing the world. I am passionate about being an individual and being one-of-a-kind.

My passions are what make me who I am. It's what makes me different from another person and another and another.

I've been going crazy on the internet; twittering, meeting all these new people.

People who I find inspirational.

People who I find fascinating.

People who I find insightful.

People who I find funny.

People who are amazing artists.

I've been reading about these people and I want to be them. They have one clear voice. One clear mind. I want to do the things they were doing because it would make me more like them.... and I'd be admired. (Twisted thinking?? Yes... I'm well aware of that).

I've been so jumbled up lately that untwisting myself has been painful. But, I'm getting there. I can feel it in my bones that my time for change is coming. I've been begging to God for years to change my life.... and it has come.

I always tell my friends, if you don't bother changing your shitty life now, God will do it for you and it probably won't be an easy win that He throws you.

Well, my throw was a baby and re-figuring my life has taken many sleepless nights, so much re-thinking and so so many tears. But, it's almost over. All the pieces are starting to fall permanently in place.

So, I've decided. I've decided where I want to go in life. What I want to do with life. (notice I say WITH not IN).

I started off with thinking about a word. In one word, how would I describe myself. Artist was the first thing that popped into my head. This actually surprised me; I haven't considered myself a true artist since I was a kid with all my pencil crayons, paints and paper. But, I realized that the term artist doesn't have to involve just art art... like a true artist, art can be molded into another form.

My art is more the art of the mind. I like thinking, I like dreaming. So my art is the art of my dreams which I plan on materializing into life.

Life is short. You have to organize your life efficiently in order to maximize your time here on Earth. I like being busy; having things to do, but this last trimester, I've found myself with so much free time that I end up filling my time with small things that I enjoy. Who cares if it furthers my career or if it increases my learning! It makes that one day a little bit more special.

With this social media phenomenon, people are rushing back to their computers to see what's been happening since they last checked. That stuff is fun but, you can't live life through a computer screen. Virtual relationships are great... but what about the relationship you have with yourself? I really enjoy writing my blog. I do it for myself and for whoever else is interested, but that's not my priorty. I keep reading lists and lists of how to make your blog stand out from the crowd.

1. Choose a topic. 2) Write frequently. 3) Cater to your audience..........
   

I don't want to do that. Not yet. I just want to keep things simple and write about my life. I've learnt so much from just observing and hearing about other people's lives. I want to be able to do that for somebody else.

I have lots of talents, abilities, knowledge. I don't WANT to just choose one or two that I'm good at and focus on that. That's too stifling for my personality. So, I decide that I'm just going to do everything and see how that goes.

I don't want my blog to be stable. I want it to reflect exactly how I think and what I'm experiencing at that moment. It's my story.

So here's where I'm going from here. I'm going to really start up my underwear business because I just LOVE underwear too much. I couldn't decide which project to start on but I feel like being crafty so underwear is definitely the way to go.

I'm going to NOT let the business overload my life by taking some easy measures

• Meditate before going to bed
  
• Breathe in some fresh air everyday (even if that means sticking my nose out my window for 5 mins)
  
• Blogging as often as I can.... writing is a way to keep me on track and to just think outloud
  
• Simply take some time off and re-evaluate when needed. The fear of losing my passion will keep me from falling off the wagon.
  

I like multi-tasking. I'm really good at it. So I'm not worried about losing my path again. I just have to focus on what I want and keep focusing on it until I don't want to anymore.

I know where my priorities lie (which makes life a lot easier). I'm going to finish my little painting and finish my funeral plan for school.

No rush... everything will happen in time.

writing like diarrhea

Step 1: Expose Yourself

As mentioned in an earlier post, writing is a skill I want to improve. What I thought would be easy turned out to be hard. I have all these thoughts that I want to pour out but finding the right words and way to say it is hard. I also don't write about some of the things I want to write about because I don't know how to target my tornado emotions into words.

Here's an exercise that I found really useful in helping me through my writing:

If you allowed yourself to, what would be the most difficult thing you would write about? What memory keeps leaking through? What have you lived through that change your life? What has happened to you that hasn't happened to anyone else?
...
Set the timer for 15 minutes and begin to write. Begin with an action: "When I told him I was leaving, he..."; "She came to me, her face long, and she told me...". Or any other lines that begin in the middle of things.

-Pen on Fire, by Barbara DeMarco-Barrett

Step 2: Style and Voice

Writing style and voice is unique to every writer. Coming up with your own voice is something that is developped over years. I've been writing in journals since I was 11 (every since the day I got my first period). It may not be polished, interesting writing, but I've developed a kind of style.

I prefer a very casual style of writing. I want it to read as if I was talking to you. Writing style is something that needs to be worked on continuously if you want it to be consistent and good.

The Importance of Paper

I love notebooks.

I'm very picky notebook purchaser. The feel, the weight, the look have to be perfect.

I like thick paper in my notebook because I press hard on my pens and don't like when my pens leak through.

I like my notebook having 3 holes because then the notebook feels more casual and I don't mind ripping out stuff.

My current notebook is lined in green. It engages my creativity. So much more interesting to write on green lines than blue lines.

The cover of my notebook is my design. It's made out of pink scrapbook tissue paper with embedded shreds of gold ribbons. A single white, square tissuepaper with a faint hint of pink and clouds lie in the center of the cover.
Across the width of my notebook are two raspberry strips bordering the white aquare. Hidden underneath this homemade cover are Gandhi's words:

"The future depends on what we do in the present".

My notebooks must be unique. It must mimic the thousands of thoughts, ideas and dreams that are inside.

How much information is too much?

I applied for a Part time Assistant position last night. As I was writing my cover letter, I kept wondering how I could bring my personality to the letter. Cover letters are meant to be short. I debated giving the company my blog site. But then I thought about some of my blog articles that I just didn't feel comfortable with future-bosses knowing THAT much about my life.

However, it would've been so helpful for the hirer to get a better understanding of who I was if they did have access to my blog or twitter page. So much more faster and interesting than I cover letter I think.

The main question is: How much information is too much?

For example, many of my articles revolve around giving up the baby and the heartache involved with D. These thoughts may be viewed as controversial or too emotional. I don't want to be seen as a person with too much baggage. I've actually never associated myself as a person with baggage until now. I guess I do have a bigger share of problems that most people but, honestly, as long as I don't let my problems bring me down, they'll just make me a stronger person. I see my situation as just another part of life I'm supposed to learn from... not something that's meant to handicap me.

I think it's all in the presentation of yourself that makes or breaks you. Building my personal brand is something I've been working on for the last few months. The work has been more difficult that I expected. It's hard to crunch your entire being into one image. I started off with brainstorming a bunch of words that I thought really described me, my life and the essence of who I am. Next, I thought about what I wanted to give to people and get out of life. What was my message? I decided on focusing my brand on designing. It's what I love to do most in the world. I started designing my website revolving around this topic.

So far, my brand portfolio holds a website designed (just now programed yet) and business card. I think once my website is up and running, I'll feel more comfortable with giving it out. This blog is more like my personal diary. I hold nothing back and let all my thoughts, ideas and dreams flow out. This blog is kind of like my rough draft. It's where I started learning about writing and blogging. My website will be more revised and not all over the place.

A Monday diary

I woke up at 11:52 am today. Correction, I woke up at 7:48 am and didn't crawl out of bed until 11:52. I debated whether or not to spend another lethargic day bathing in nothingness. Luckily, my sister forced me into the "not".

I drove her and myself to the library to get a book titled "If You Want to Write" by Brenda Ueland. It was highly recommended on this new blog I love (Presentation Zen). Plus, I've been wanting to improve my writing.

Sadly, as what usually happens in libraries, the book (though declared as 'Checked in') could not be found in its rightful place on the bookshelf. Over my fat, heavy body was I going to trudge around and try to find it. So I picked up another book that had a cover I connected with. "PEN ON FIRE".

I've read the opening quotation so far and have already written 10 blog rough-drafts, this journal and a bunch of other creative thoughts. I also found 2 new amazing blogs. This book is amazing. Ha Ha Ha.

Back to my day... I drove around the neighbourhood running little errands with Chi Mai revolving around:

a) exchanging my X-mas presents
b) letting Chi Mai window shop.

I did successfully buy some fantastic post-it notes ON SALE at Staplex and will buy an adorable water bottle at Chapters when the place is a little less crowded.

I got home around 3 hours later and relaxed for a bit before heading out to Milestones with the SPLX girls. It was a fun night. Good food, lots of food, great service (the manager herself guarenteed me that I wouldn't die from my allergies while I was here). I've never had that before! I love those girls so much. We each have our distinct personaities and are pretty different from each other but for some reason, we're really great friends. With most of my friends, our relationships and chillfests are just splurges of the moment. But with these girls, we go out of our way to make time for each other... even if only once every 3 months.

And now, here I am... tired but too wired with creative diarrhea. Plus, the wind is blowing at like, 60 km/h makiing my house super creaky.

PS. Baby is getting sooooo heavy. My back is killing me.